The Last

It’s been two months since I last wrote on this lovely blog. It’s also, more significantly, been just over a year since I first started writing on here. Good times, that year.

I’m sure you’re wondering why I haven’t written since January. The biggest reason is, I went on a trip to South Africa. Our team of twenty-one spent three weeks visiting churches and teaching on prayer, justice, and the Father’s love. It was my first international trip (besides Canada. sorry, Canada), and I think I’ve caught the travel bug. There’s just… so many people! People, man. People. Every single person I saw had his or her own story. Al in Dulles International Airport, the two ladies in their fifties who noisily met on the international flight for the first time, Greg in Jeffreys Bay, Ben and Celeste in Johannesburg, Dres in Vanderbiljpark, the lion cub keeper at the Lion and Rhino Park—they all have their own story. Years of experiences that I don’t know. Struggles and triumphs, trials and victories, they have them all.

We are all in a story together, the greatest story ever told. No man is an island.

Is the sword still to the grindstone, you might ask? Yes, it is. Well… sort of. I dream of it being against the stone, of it sharpened and honed till pen is sharper than blade. But my wants must combine with my initiative and diligence, and therein lies the lack.

This morning Mike Bickle preached on how God defines success. Not surprisingly, it is different than ours. We tend to measure success based on size of impact. You are successful if you reach thousands, though millions are preferred. Small impact means small success.

God’s definition is, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” Pressing on to do good, be diligent, and act with a servant’s heart—these are what defines a person’s success. We are born with a desire for greatness, but greatness does not correspond with numbers. My success is defined by how I grow in these three virtues. And the crux of these three is faithfulness. Diligence. Careful and persistent work. Many start, but few finish strong.

I want to be one of those. I want to be one to whom the Lord says, “Well done, good and faithful servant. You pressed on. Your faithfulness was weak, yes, but you pressed on.”

In my life, one of those categories in which to press on is writing. This blog is both a help and an indictment in that. It stands as a testament that I’m trying, but also demonstrates my weakness. I start to write a post and realize that I don’t have much to talk about, because my ideas still sit on the shelf, notes pile up but pages remain blank….

The sword is not to the stone. But I want it to be. I want to be a scribe trained for the kingdom of heaven.

But this isn’t why I’m writing. I’m writing to say that this blog is coming to an end.

Oh… I feel the sadness of that. No, I’m not going to stop writing. But this blog was originally started solely as a place to practice writing. Since then I’ve started other blogs about other topics, and when I reached five blogs, I decided I needed to consolidate. From now on, all of my topics—creative writing, Jesus, short stories, and media—will reside at JesseKoepke.wordpress.com.

This blog won’t be taken down, but neither will be updated. It will stand as a monument to when I picked up my forgotten sword from the corner and sought to grind from it the rust and dust I had allowed to accumulate.

I’m a nostalgic guy, and thinking of not coming to this blog anymore makes me sad. I remember the times I wrote in my old room, laptop hot on my legs, an eye on the slow-moving clock, and a dictionary word my only inspiration. The sailor never retrieved the box. The mole never dreamed again. I remember wanting to change the blog theme but being unable to find one that fit the old-time, ornate feel Quentin possessed so well.

Those days are now at an end.

“But, Lord, help me keep the sword to the stone! Oh Lord! I desire to be a scribe trained for the kingdom of heaven! Holy Spirit, work in me! Create in me a persevering, diligent heart! I am weak, oh so weak…. Take these hands. Use these hands. Use them to break chains and release revelation. Use these feeble hands and this rusty sword to send forth truth. Thank you for the talent you’ve given me. Help me not to bury it in the ground.”

We have reached it. The end. The last.

Farewell, good friend. I shall remember you.